When a man seems distant or just not as concerned about you as he used to be, it can make you feel so afraid and powerless. You don’t want him to slip away. You don’t want to feel so insecure.
- What to do if he is distant and seems to have fallen out of love.
- Word-for-word love scripts to help you bring him closer than ever before.
- The secret psychology that makes him want to commit for life.
- The magic power you didn’t know you had to make him want you.
You want to know what’s wrong–if it’s you or something else. Most of all, you want to do SOMETHING to fix things. Why does it seem so hard to keep a man’s attention beyond those early days when he couldn’t stand to be away from you? Now, it seems that something else is always more important–his work, his buddies, his car. You hate to admit this, but when you’re apart from him, he doesn’t even seem to MISS you. It hurts. Yet the more painful aspect of all this is that what you’re doing to try to fix things and get him close to you again is actually… pushing him further away.
Working Hard For His Love Never Works
If you’re anything like me, a man’s distance feels like a threat. You want to be front and center in his life. And when it seems like you’re not, it’s all you can think about. Suddenly, you start scanning his every move for signs that he just doesn’t care about you as much as he used to.
You have an urge to stop him from slipping away, so you start doing all the things you think will draw him in. You become extra caring, accommodating, and doting. You become low maintenance so he doesn’t think you’re too much work. You offer to cook for him, rub his back, have more sex. You keep asking him what’s wrong. In short, you’re doing what I call “Overfunctioning”–working hard for his love. And yet he never stands up and says, “What a fool I’ve been! You’re the most wonderful woman in the world, and I need to shower you with love forever.”
Instead, he gets sullen and moody. He becomes annoyed and angry when you try to get close to him. Maybe he even says those dreaded words: “I need space.” Then things get even harder.
Overworked And Underloved
As you do, do, and do for a man, and he pulls further away, something else happens: you become frustrated, bitter, and resentful. You hate that you’re putting so much into the relationship and getting so little in return. You still don’t feel like you’re #1 in his eyes, no matter what you do. And that’s exactly the problem–all you’re DOING! The things you are doing to entice a man and pull him closer are actually working against you.
Men fall in love with you because of how much they give to YOU, not the other way around. That’s why they pull away when you try to fix the relationship by giving. And then when you become frustrated by his lack of reciprocity, you inadvertently push him away even further–because no man wants to be around a resentful woman. Don’t be hard on yourself, because there’s a reason why you’re operating this way, and it has to do with assuming that what feels good to you also feels good to a man. You think: “I feel good when a man goes out of his way to give to me, so it must work the other way as well.”
But it’s exactly the opposite. Not fixing may seem like the last thing in the world you want to do, but it’s the fastest way to make him feel an uncontrollable desire to be close to you again.
Here are three ways to do it:
Close your eyes and think about what it feels like in your body when a man is pulling away from you, or when he just doesn’t seem to think about you as much. You probably feel it in your gut–a lurching sensation that just feels heavy and awful.
Now, what’s happening in your body when you picture a man pulling away and going further off into the distance? Can you FEEL your body wanting to lean forward and doing anything you can to stop him from going away? This “leaning forward” urgency is what causes a man to feel pressured and cornered. That’s why you need to STOP it by doing the opposite: leaning BACK.
What’s happening when you want a man’s attention–and when you want it desperately? Where is YOUR attention? That’s right–it’s on him! Wrong. The more you keep your focus on him, the more he will turn away from you. How do you stop? By redirecting all your time and energy back to yourself.
Have you ever been mad at a man for ignoring you, and then when he tries to get close again you give him the cold shoulder? How dare he think he can just waltz right back into your arms! Yet the most powerful thing you can do in such a moment is to receive him and melt right into him. This might be the most challenging move, but it’s so worth it.
Article Provided at: Have The Relationship You Want
I’ve been debating on whether or not to let my hair go naturally grey and started to check out images of youthful looking women, who have done just that. Hmmm. If, they can pull it off, then why can’t I? Right?
I think my hesitation has a lot to do with my own sexuality. Turning 65 this year, has really made me sit back and take notice of my life, who I am, what I have yet to accomplish, and yes, questioning my own sexuality. It has also made me wonder, what other women my age might be thinking.
Is there sex beyond our fifties and sixties? You bet there is! Sexuality for baby boomers is full of surprises! We came from the crazy era, of free sex, no bras, drugs, rock and roll, and are now finding ourselves embracing a future, with a whole new set of rules. First, let me say though, not all of us were experimenting back then. I was married at twenty-one and raising a family a few years later, while holding down a full-time job. I have to chuckle. For many of us mature ladies, the music has changed and the only drugs we’re reaching for are to lower our blood pressure and relieve our joint pain.
But sex and relationships are AMEN still running full steam ahead!
Are you a Baby Boomer, entering into a new relationship, or doubting your own sexuality? Do you have concerns about taking the next step? Heck, you’re probably wondering what the next step is? Quite simply, it’s at this stage of your life, just enjoy! Experimenting with your sexuality. Try something you never dared doing in your younger years. Take the reins and be the aggressor. It’s okay to be naughty and wanton. It’s perfectly natural to want to explore. Your partner will come to life … I promise you. Just remember though, if you’re venturing into a new relationship after a long dry spell of no activity, protect yourself. STD’s are higher than ever amongst seniors so, make sure your partner has been tested before intimacy comes into play.
Sex is also way more different than it was in our twenties and thirties. Our maturity has made us less uptight, restrictive, and I think way more relaxed about unleashing our inhibitions. We’ve learned far to often, that life is too short and supposed to be lived to the fullest. I still think I’m sexy, despite my wrinkles, not so firm skin, and the age spots beginning to pop up. When I think of what I’ve been through in life, every damn wrinkle is a sign of my survival and strength. Now is not the time to worry about getting old. Now is the time to think about grasping hold of each new day we are blessed with and kicking life in the ass!
Sexuality is a thought process. If you think it, you are. Relationships, love, and sex, don’t die as we age. They will, only if you allow them to. There is nothing wrong with still having that desire to be touched, to be close, and to be intimate. And yes, we can still enjoy great sex, despite how unappealing the idea might be to our children and grandchildren!
The fact is, we ain’t DEAD! We are very much alive, bursting with all the needs, desires, and passions of years ago.
Is sixty the new thirty? If you ask the “baby boomer” generation one might be hesitant to agree. It’s not to say they won’t respond, “Just because I’m sixty, doesn’t mean I still don’t feel like a thirty-year old.”
Times have changed and senior life these days simply is not what it use to be thirty years ago especially, when it comes to dating. As time marches on, those over the age of sixty refuse to be left behind. Now more than ever, seniors are active… keeping themselves in great shape, following the advances in medicine and watching what they are eating. In comparison to generations past, senior citizens are more vital and vibrant about life and living it to the fullest.
Does it make a difference if they are ready for retirement and looking for a partner? Not if you were to ask them. Being over sixty is just as much fun and proving to be an even more rewarding experience.
Relationship experts will be the first to say that no matter what our age, dating and relationships are just as important to a strong, healthy attitude and a rewarding, fulfilling personal life. Allowing nerves and fear to get in the way of developing a healthy intimate relationship despite our age, is only a deterrent. Dating most certainly should not be something to be afraid of.
As we reach that comfortable stage in our lives, many of those issues that face younger singles aren’t as significant and rarely exist at all. Career, raising a family and financial security are not as prominent, leading boomers to be more casual, flexible and less stressful. Those 55 and older have been there and done that. Life experiences have made them realize that the simpler things in life and having someone to share them with are more important than money, status and outside beauty.
Entering the over fifty dating scene for the first time isn’t any different than if you were thirty or forty. There is going to be a certain level of nervousness and trepidation. But like anything else in life… if you don’t do, you don’t get. So if you are looking to re-establish a potential loving and fulfilling relationship know that life is what you make of it, no matter what your age.
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